What do you get when you take two hookers to Red Lobster?
10% off for bringing your own crabs.
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Why did God give women belly buttons?
For somewhere to stash your gum on the way down.
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman?
A: Too close to the gas chamber.
What's the rudest type of Elf?
The GofuckyoursElf.
I think I just evolved into Homo Erectus.
A biker walks into a gay bar and sits down to have a drink when a guy walks up to him and asks "hey biker you ever played barroom football"?
"What are you talking about" the biker replies.
"You know you guzzle a beer down that's the touchdown then pull your pants down and bend over and if you can fart the kicks well."
The gay guy goes first to demonstrate.
The biker states "I can do that and even better."
He chugs the beer, slams the bottle, stands up pulls his pants down bends over to fart the gay guy jumps behind him and shouts "blocked that kick".
A guy went to a whore house and asked the lady if she had a woman that could handle 16 inches.
"Hmm," said the madam. "I'm not sure. Try the first door on the right."
So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and immediately heard screams.
"It's too big! Take it out!" So he went to the madam.
"No, really. I need someone who can handle 16 inches."
"Hmm," said the madam. "Try the last door."
So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and had the time of his life, surprised that there was no scream at all.
In fact, he heard no sounds at all.
Puzzled, he finished up and pulled out.
"Talk to me, baby."
"Moo."
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period?
A. Finger painting.
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Two men were talking:
First : "Can U put the word 'penis' in a sentence?"
Second: "Yo mama's pussy."
Tow millipedes went for honey moon.
The male one asked: "My darling, between which feet is your pussy, please?"
Q: If Nuts on your chest are Chestnuts and Nuts on a wall are Walnuts. What are Nuts on your chin called?
A: A Cock in the mouth!
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