Joke #4899

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Give her an M&M bag, and tell her to alphabetize it.
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has 63.51 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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Blonde cop pulls over blonde motorist. Cop asks the motorist to see her license so the blonde searches in her purse & tells the blonde cop that she must have forgot it at home. The blonde cop asks the blonde motorist does she have any other type of identification so she searches in her purse again, looks at a pocket mirror & says, "I have a picture of myself." The cop asks to see it so the blonde motorist hands over the pocket mirror. The blonde cop looks at it & says, "Well if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn't have even pulled you over."
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Did you hear about the two dumb blonds who went two the drive in theater and froze two death they went two see closed for the winter?
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has 24.95 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, death, stupid, winter
A German woman is walking down the street. Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her. She screams, "Nein!, Nein" So two guys walk away.
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has 51.27 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: blonde, communication, ethnic, sex, stupid
What did the blonde say when she found out that she was pregnant? I hope it's not mine.
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has 76.53 % from 166 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde and brunette were watching the 6 o’clock news. The news was about a man about ready to jump off a bridge. The brunette turns to the blonde and says, ” I BET you $50 the man is going to jump.” The blonde replies, “Okay you’re on.” Sure enough, the man jumps, and the blonde gives the brunette $50. The brunette says, “I can’t accept this MONEY. I watched the 5 o’clock news and saw the man jump then.” “No, you have to take it,” says the blonde. “I watched the 5 o’clock news too, but I didn’t think he would do it again.”
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: blonde, death, money
A blonde decides to join the military thinking she can meet a few guys. What is wrong with this joke? 1. This isn't a joke 2. The blonde is thinking
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has 54.33 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: blonde, military
An Australian guy walks into a bar with a crocodile under his arm. He asks the bartender if he will give him free drinks if he shows he can put his penis inside the crocs mouth for 15 seconds without it getting bit off. The bartender agrees. The guy opens the crocs mouth and puts his penis inside it; the croc gently closes his mouth and after 15 seconds the Australian hits him over the head with a bottle, causing the croc to open his mouth and let the guy withdraw his penis. The bartender starts serving the free drinks to the Austr alian and then tells everyone in the bar "If anyone else can do that then I will give them free drinks also". There is a pause and then a blonde woman calls out "ok, I will do it but please don't hit me so hard over my head with the bottle".
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has 79.83 % from 261 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, blonde, dirty, geography
A blond was taking a shower and her husband called in and asked "did you find the new dry hair shampoo I picked up for you?" And the blond replied "yes but there's a problem I already got my hair wet"
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has 34.09 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde, husband
Q: What did the blonde say when she was offered a position at the UN? A: Would that be a "missionary position?"
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two tourists were driving through Wisconsin. As they were approaching Oconomowoc, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee. "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly? The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said, Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiing."
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has 83.62 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: blonde, travel