A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
"My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"
"Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him."
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth.
Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy.“
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A black guys is walking through the woods, he starts to hear a sounds.
It goes ching chong wu.
So he starts to walk to wear he heard the sound.
Soon enough he comes across a Chinese guy and a river.
The black guy ask was that noise.
The Chinese guy say, every time I throw a quarter in this river it tells me a name of an old relative.
See watch, Chinese guy throws a quarter, ching chong chun.
The black guy says let me try.
He throws a quarter in and the river says, chimpanzee.
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Q: How do you know Noah was a White man?
A: No nigger could stay on a boat for 40 days without eating the chickens!
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What’s the difference between a pigeon and a nigger?
The pigeon is white and the nigger can’t fly!
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What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a boy scout?
A boyscout who helps little old ladies hop across the street.
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Q: Why is the camel called the ship of the desert?
A: Because it's full of Arab semen.
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What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and sheep?
A wooly jumper.
Q: What do you call a cow playing with its self?
A: Beef stroganoff.
Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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What do you call a dinosaur that destroys everything in its path?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Mom why have I got these huge three-toed feet?"
The mother replies, "Well son, when we trek across the desert your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand."
"Okay," said the son. A few minutes later the son asks, "Mom, why have I got these great long eyelashes?"
"They are there to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert," "Thanks Mom," replies the son.
After a short while, the son returns and asks, "Mom, why have I got these great big humps on my back?"
The mother, now a little impatient with the boy replies, "They are there to help us store fat for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without water for long periods."
"That's great mom, so we have huge feet to stop us sinking, and long eyelashes to keep the sand from our eyes and these humps to store water, but Mom ..." "Yes son?"
"What good does all that do us here in the San Diego Zoo?"