What's pink and spits?
A baby in a frying pan.
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Similar jokes
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Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
A: Shoot him before he hits the water.
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I got in trouble during high school for masturbating in the showers.
Apparently it completely ruined the trip to Auschwitz.
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They say the surest way to a man's heart is through the stomach.
But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.
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Why are little girls better than little boys?
Because when you're finished using them as little girls, you can turn them over and use them as little boys.
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Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish.
After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns.
Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news.
She opens the door and hears Fred sing:
"Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"
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A beautiful young girl is about to undergo a minor operation.
She’s laid on a hospital trolley bed with nothing on, except a sheet over her.
The nurse pushes the trolley down the corridor towards the operating theatre, where she leaves the girl on the trolley outside, while she goes in to check whether everything is ready.
A young man wearing a white coat approaches, lifts the sheet up and starts examining her naked body.
He puts the sheet back and then walks away and talks to another man in a white coat.
The second man comes over, lifts the sheet and does the same examinations.
When a third man does the same thing, but more closely, she grows impatient and says: “All these examinations are fine and appreciated, but when are you going to start the operation?”
The man in the white coat shrugged his shoulders: “I have no idea. We’re just painting the corridor.”
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Join the Army, meet some fascinating people, then kill them.
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Use to be we had Bob Hope, Johnny Cash, and Steven Jobs.
Now we have no hope, no cash, and no jobs.
Please do not die Kevin Bacon.
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Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
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What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.
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