If women knew what men were really thinking, they'd never stop slapping them.
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Q: What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
A: Snowballs.
Men are like.....Vacations.
They never seem to be long enough.
A man is in a mall and sees a clothes store.
He sees a magnificent, brand new jacket in the shop window and decides he shall try it on and buy it.
So he walks into the shop and asks an employee: "Excuse me sir."
"How can I help you" the employee replies.
"Could I by any chance try on that jacket in your shop window?"
The employee looks at him and says "No you shall not you are to try it on in the changing rooms like everybody else!"
Vote:
How are men like noodles?
They're always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
Men are like.....Weather.
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
Stupid?
He wanted to be a farmer.
So he studied pharmacy.
How can you tell if a man is aroused?
He's breathing.
A drunk guy took a cat home to his wife and said: "See... here is the a monkey of the jungle."
His wife said laughing, "That's a CAT ..."
He said back to his wife, "I am talking to the cat!"