Joke #5176

A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all on a building about to jump off. They all jump at the same time. Which one landed last? The blonde because she asked for directions.
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has 63.61 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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How many blondes does it take to milk a cow? Five - one to hold the udder, and four to lift and the cow up and down.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blond smokes in her yard. The garbage man asks her: Any garbage today? Yes, tree sacks please...
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has 12.66 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving. The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord and nothing happens. She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing. The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells, "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
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has 61.59 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: airplane, blonde
A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the North side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde." The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The Blonde opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
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has 79.31 % from 145 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A midget is riding a bus when a blonde steps on him. “Hey you, brunette, watch where you're going,” yells the midget. The blonde looks down and says, “I am not a brunette, I am a blonde.” The midget replies, “Not from where I'm standing.”
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has 57.73 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: Once there was the tooth fairy, Santa Claus, Easter bunny, a smart blonde and a dumb blonde they were walking down the road when they saw a $100 dollars bill who gets it?? A: No one the first four doesn't exist and the other blonde thought it was a gum wrapper!
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has 47.97 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: blonde, easter, money, Santa, stupid
Q: Why did the blonde get so excited when she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months? A: Because on the box it said "From 2-4 years."
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What do you call a blonde chick standing on her head? A: A brunette.
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has 48.02 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: blonde, women
Q. What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes? A. Frosted Flakes.
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has 22.36 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two bums are sitting talking. The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever! This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground. So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fucking one of them... had the best day ever." The second bum just laughs, "That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks. You know what I did? I fucked her all day long." The other bum interrupts, "Bull! You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life." The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good blowjob?" The other replies no. "How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a blow job?" To which the other replies, "How could she? She didn't have a head!"
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has 20.71 % from 240 votes. More jokes about: black humor, blonde, death, sex