A blonde and a brunette walk past a flower shop and see the brunette's boyfriend buying flowers.
She sighs and says, "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again. Now, I'll be expected to spend the weekend on my back with my legs in the air."
The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"
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A blonde has sharp pains in her side.
The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis."
The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
Q. To a blonde, what is long and hard?
A. Grade 4.
Q: Why did the blonde fail her drivers liscence?
A: She wasn't used to the front seat!
Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.
A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.
"We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder.
" The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down.
Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement and announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away.
Junior shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde! We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!"
Q: Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian?
A: She liked kids...
How do you determine a blonde’s IQ?
With a tyre gauge.
Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer?
So she could keep the refrigerator cold.
how come blondes don't wear tampons?
so their crabs don't go bungie jumping.
What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common?
"You keep hearing about them, but never see any."