A blonde and a brunette walk past a flower shop and see the brunette's boyfriend buying flowers.
She sighs and says, "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again. Now, I'll be expected to spend the weekend on my back with my legs in the air."
The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"
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A blonde gets her haircut while wearing a pair of headphones.
The hairdresser asks her to take them off, but she protests that she'll die without them.
The hairdresser sighs, and starts cutting the hair around the headphones.
Soon, the blonde falls asleep, and the hairdresser removes the headphones.
A few minutes later, the blonde collapses, dead on the floor.
Alarmed, the hairdresser puts the headphones to his ear and hears, "Breathe in. Breathe out."
Q: How do you keep a blonde busy for 7 hours?
A: Give her a piece of paper that has the words "Turn Over" on both sides.
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls, and sat down next to of all people a beautiful, you guessed it, blonde.
The blonde kept looking quizzically at him and his bulging pockets.
Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls."
Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully and finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"
Q: How many blonde jokes are there?
A: One. The rest are all true stories.
What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have?
One that never misses a period.
A blonde was sitting in economy class... on a flight from Seattle to Chicago.
What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
‘Oh look! Doughnut seeds!’
Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets?
A: She went looking for the three guys.
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A: After a dye job.
Four blondes drive to a bar in their old pickup truck.
Three sit in the cab and one sits in the bed of the truck.
The three blondes go into the bar and order a round of shots.
Almost an hour later, the fourth blonde finally joins them.
"Where have you been?" they ask.
Clearly frustrated, she responds, "Well, you all forgot to open the tail gate!"