Teacher: How we use the light?
Pupil: To suck it?
Teacher: Why do you say so?
Pupil: Because every night, my mother says to my father, "Switch off the light, I wanna suck it!"
Similar jokes
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Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar on her head?
A: All you can eat under a buck.
Q: How do you keep black youth off the streets?
A: Put a KFC on the sidewalk
Vote:
Joe is on his last day at work as a mailman.
He receives many thank-you cards and monetary gifts along his route.
When he gets to the very last house, he is greeted by a gorgeous housewife, who invites him in for lunch.
Joe happily accepts.
After lunch, the woman invites him up to the bedroom for some "desert."
Joe happily accepts again.
When they are done, the woman gives him a dollar.
Joe asks what the dollar is all about.
The woman replies: "It was my husband's suggestion. When I told him that it was your last day at work, he told me 'F**k him, give him a dollar. The lunch was my idea."
Knock,Knock,
Who is there?
Pen!
Pen who?
is...
Vote:
A Male patient just recovered successfully from a sex threatening health attack.
He was wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose and laying on hospital bed.
An young nurse came to cleanse his body with sponge.
The patient mumbled, “Are my testicles black?”
Nurse replied, “I don’t know Sir, I am just setting you clean”
The patient repeated again, “Are my testicles black?”
Nurse was quite embarrassed to answer the question and said “Sir everything should be OK”
The patient just kept on asking again and again, “Are my testicles black?”
Nurse could not bear a patient concerned so much.
So she raised his gown, moved her hand to find and grab his penis and testicle, moved it all around, checked very closely and suddenly man ejaculated on nurse’s hand.
The man pulls off his oxygen mask, embarrassed at the fiasco says loudly enough, “Ma’am, Thanks but I still need to know 'Are my tests results back?’”
While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man’s balls.
To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decided to replace the missing testicle with a pickled onion.
Several weeks later, the patient returned for a checkup. “How’s your sex life?” asked the doctor.
“Pretty good,” the man said, to the doctor’s obvious relief.
But then the patient added, “I’ve had some strange side effects that are causing serious problems.”
“What’s that?” the doctor asked anxiously.
“Well, every time I urinate, my eyes water.”
“Hmm,” said the doctor, thoughtfully.
“That’s not all,” continued the patient. “When my wife does me orally, she gets heartburn.”
“Hmm,” said the doctor, as his face reddened.
“It gets worse, Doc. Now, every time I pass a hamburger stand….I get an erection!”
Q: What's worse than ants in your pants?
A: Uncle.
I'd have a comeback for that, but all my come's backed up in your throat.
I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.