Man comes home to his wife and says to her: "With the new pair of glasses, you look like sh.t."
"But I don't have a new pair of glasses..." she replies.
"But, I do."
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Q: How big are the pastro's beds?
A: Oh c'mon, it knows every little kid.
What's the difference between a condom and a coffin?
You come in one and you go in the other!
Q: How can you spot the blind guy in a nudist colony?
A: It's not hard.
A lecturer who was drunk walked in a class.
Ater few minutes he wanted to urinate, he ran out and open a zip slowly, so that he may urinate.
After urinating, that's when he realized that the zip he opened was for a jacket.
Q: What is Moby Dick's dad's name?
A: Papa Boner
A cow and a horse were galloping around a curve opposite to.
They landed in each other.
Who was wrong?
The cow, it didn't blow its horn.
*How girls become friends*
Omg I love your shoes!
*How guys become friends*
Excuse me sir, I see you fuck bitches, I myself, also fuck bitches.
Vote:
Q: What is a difference between Ooooh and Aaaah?
A: Only 3 inches.
Vote:
One night, a horny old geezer decides to get himself a hooker.
Since the man doesn't have much money, he looks for the cheapest whore in the nearest Red Light District.
A short while later, he finds what he's looking for and spends $10 for oral sex and intercourse.
The next morning, the old geezer wakes up and discovers he has crabs.
So, he gets dressed and heads down to where he had been the night before.
He notices the same hooker on the street corner, so he marches over to her and says, "Hey, lady, you gave me crabs!"
The hooker replies, "Hey, old man, what did you expect for $10? Lobster?"