Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room.
The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Neil Armstrong was the first person to walk on the moon, Chuck Norris was the first person to walk on the sun.
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There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard.
There is only another fist.
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Chuck Norris never needs help, help needs Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' driver's license simply shows his shoe size.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get stuck in traffic, traffic gets stuck in Chuck Norris.
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When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer.
You will score a 1600.
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After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
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Water can drown if Chuck Norris stays underwater for too long.
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Chuck Norris climbed the stairway to heaven, and came back down again.
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