Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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Do you know Chuck Norris?
Yes?
Then he shall allow you to live... for now.
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When Chuck Norris first saw Dragon Ball Z he thought it was a series of easy workout videos.
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Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
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Chuck Norris cleans up crime... with a mop and bucket... full of people's blood.
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The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
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Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
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Every resturant has a drive thru when you're riding shotgun with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Superman is weakened when exposed to Kryptonite.
Chuck Norris eats Kryptonite for breakfast without even a belch.
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