Chuck Norris can actually punch you in the soul.
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Chuck Norris invented black.
In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light.
Except pink.
Tom Cruise invented pink.
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Chuck Norris doesn't lift weights he tells his muscles to get bigger.
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When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school.
When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
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Chuck norris plays frisbee with his retinas.
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Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
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Chuck Norris eats granite and drinks lava for his lunch.
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He opens the door then turns the handle.
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Ghost Busters call Chuck Norris.
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Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same.
Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
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Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.
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