Chuck Norris stared in to the mirror and said, "There can only be one Chuck Norris."
Then his reflection cried and walked away.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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There is no theory of evolution.
Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
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If you want a list of Chuck Norri's enemies, just check the extinct species list.
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Allstate gets insurance from Chuck Norris, because even Allstate needs to be in good hands.
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A total eclipse won't look directly at Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris could play cd-based games on his Nintendo 64.
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Chuck Norris does not have to "Fight for his right to Party".
Parties have to fight for their right to Chuck Norris.
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Finally, they discovered real cause of Bruce Lee's death – extreme exhaustion from fight with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can paint himself into a corner and still get the job done.
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Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse.
He uses a lion.
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