Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt Everest by accident.
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When Chuck Norris was 12 years old, he mauled a pit bull.
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Lightning doesn't strike Chuck Norris, chuck norris strikes lightning!
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The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas.
He just hired Chuck Norris.
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Columbus may have discovered America, but after a conversation with Chuck Norris it was decided, Chuck Norris discovered America.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.
Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls...
He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
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Chuck Norris once sued a Law and Order Company because those are the trademark item names of his right and left legs.
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Chuck Norris kissed a girl once.
She's still blushing, we call her Sun.
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