Q:What do you get if you add two apples and three apples?
A:A high school math problem!
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Q: What did the constipated mathematician do?
A: He worked it out with a pencil!
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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Q: What does the zero say to the the eight?
A: Nice belt!
Old mathematicians never die - they just lose some of their functions.
If you had a million dollars and gave away one quarter, and another quarter, and then another quarter, how much would you have left?
A million dollars minus 75 cents.
Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.
If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my math class: it would seem so much longer.
Life is like a definite integral.
Integral from birthday to death ( LOVE ) dx = LIFE
A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad.
His wife asks impatiently: "So, is it a boy or a girl" ?
The logician replies: "yes".
Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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