Math tells us three of the saddnest love stories:
1)Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever.
2)Parallel lines who were never meant to meet.
3)Asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together.
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Teacher: "Are you good at math?"
Pupil: "Yes and no."
Teacher: "What do you mean?"
Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"
Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.
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Two random variables were talking in a bar.
They thought they were being discrete but I heard their chatter continuously.
Q: What did one math book say to the other?
A: Don't bother me I've got my own problems!
Q: How do mathematicians induce good behavior in their children?
A: "If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times..."
"Students nowadays are so clueless", the math professor complains to a colleague.
"Yesterday, a student came to my office hours and wanted to know if General Calculus was a Roman war hero..."
If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my math class: it would seem so much longer.
E=mc squared.
E multiplied by mc squared=Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'"
Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'"
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