When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does.
NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
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Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
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Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy.
"There were no survivors."
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The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of scrabble using only numbers.
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Chuck Norris can hear pictures.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light.
Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Scooby Doo prefers Norris snacks'.
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Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
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