When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does.
NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
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For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
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Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple.
Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
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Chuck Norris used to date Hurricane Katrina.
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The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Note to self:
Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired.
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Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
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Chuck Norris is the reason Pluto is no longer a planet.
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Chuck Norris doesn't try to find clowns they try to find him.
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