Everyone knows Chuck Norris' pet rock... he named it "Earth."
The real reason that Oprah is ending her show on television is that Chuck phoned and said "That's enough!"
Chuck Norris won the gold, silver and bronze medals at the Olympics. In the same event. From home.
When Chuck Norris put his hand over a magnet, the magnet comes to him out of pure fear.
In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
In the beginning, God created light because Chuck allowed him to.
They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Chuck Norris won a guitar battle with a violin.
Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
Most leading hand sanitizers say that they can kil 99.99% of all germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100% of WHATEVER HE WANTS.