Chuck Norris never bathes.
Dirt is too afraid to cling to him.
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Chuck Norris keyboard doesn't need a delete button.
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Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
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Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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Chuck Norris is proof that legends never die.
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Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.
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Chuck Norris throws a dodgeball at you, knocks all your teeth out.
Then the ball hits you.
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Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
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