Chuck Norris never bathes.
Dirt is too afraid to cling to him.
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The snake was punished because Chuck Norris tempted it to ate the apple.
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Jesus is the son of God.
God is the son of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
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Chuck Norris can tell you what a lethal injection feels like
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Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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The only reason Godzilla goes back into the ocean is because Chuck Norris is expecting him... for dinner.
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If Chuck Norris were a toy, everything about it would be hazardous.
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Chuck Norris once slapped a headless man.
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Chuck Norris shot a man to death with an unloaded nerf gun.
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