Joke #5775

A boss tells a blonde applicant, "I'll give you $8 an hour, starting today, and in three months, I'll raise it to $10 an hour. So, when would you like to start?" "In three months."

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.

Q. Why don't blondes eat Jello? A. They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those little packages.

What did the blonde’s holiday postcard say? ‘Having a wonderful time. Where am I?’

What do blondes put behind their ears to attract men? Their knees.

Why don't blondes like to breastfeed their babies? It hurts to boil their nipples!

blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it." The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next."

Blonde 1: Don't tell anyone but Bees scare me. Blonde 2: Dont worry, the whole alphabet scares me

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated." What does it look like?" she finally asked. The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it." The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said. The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."

What do bleached blondes and jumbo jets have in common? Black boxes.

Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips? A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.