Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
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Chuck Norris once shaved his beard.
People now call it Bigfoot.
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Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
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Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
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Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need twitter, he's already following you.
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It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor.
That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.
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Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.
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Hip-Hop is dead because of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer.
Too bad he has never cried.
Ever.
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