Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
Chuck Norris flew boats in the Vietnam War.
Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris. Once.
Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.
Got said, "Let there be light!" Chuck Norris looked at him and said: "Say please."
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, he gets jealous.
Chuck Norris does not wear a seatbelt and reclines his seat before takeoff and landing on an airplane because he can.
Chuck Norris walked into a bar. "OUCH!" said the bar.