Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
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If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you.
If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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Superman is faster then a speeding bullet.
Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
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Some check under their beds for "Penny Wise the Clown" before to sleep.
Penny Wise the Clown checks for Chuck Norris under his bed before going to sleep.
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The Ancient Egyptians still thank him for it.
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Chuck Norris got into Cambridge... without any qualifications.
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt Everest by accident.
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Chuck Norris can access private methods.
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