Chuck Norris was the image used for Papa Smurf.
The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares. Actually he can also blow your face.
If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."
Chuck Norris can build a Water Dam... In the Sahara Desert.
Extra Terrestrials often visit Earth from other galaxies - they're here to see if Chuck Norris really exists.
Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it. Dissapointed, he then walked out.
In Chuck Norris' yard, money does grow on trees.