Guy having sex says "damn bitch, there should be a law against sex this good."
To which the girl replies "I think there is daddy..."
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What happened when the cannibal bit off a missionary's ear?
He had his first taste of Christianity!
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Why do Mexicans eat beans for dinner?
So they can take bubble baths.
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Q: Why did Humpty Dumpty push his girlfriend on the wall?
A: To see her crack.
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I saw a man with one arm shopping in a second hand store.
I thought "You are never going to find here what you are looking for"...
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What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding?
A baby in a microwave.
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John Leslie has been accused of raping a disabled black girl on Blue Peter.
He blamed it on dyslexia & said he thought the script said, use sticky black spastic.
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They say that if I don't support transgender rights I'm on the wrong side of history.
At least I'm on the right side of the firing squad.
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Q: Why is Al Qaeda more compassionate than pro-lifers?
A: The 9/11 hijackers got to die instantly.
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My grandfather can no longer do the things he loved to do as a teenager.
Flying planes, bombing Germans...
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So a little kid and a child molester start walking into a forest.
They keep walking for what seems like hours, and it gets darker and darker and darker, and the forest gets deeper and deeper and deeper.
The kid turns to the child molester and he says "Gee mister, it sure is scary out here!"
The child molester says "How do you think I feel, kid? I'm gonna have to walk out of this forest by myself!"
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