Chuck Norris once dropped a glass vase onto the floor.
The glass apologized for breaking in his presence.
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Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
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The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it.
Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Mickey mouse talks like that.
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If Chuck Norris jumped off the Empire State Building, your mom would tell you to do it too.
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Wolverine has been called indestructible because of his adamantium skeleton... until Chuck Norris broke every bone in his body.
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Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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When Chuck Norris finishes his workout, the gym takes a break.
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Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
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Chuck Norris can actually describe the taste of purified water.
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