Chuck Norris once dropped a glass vase onto the floor.
The glass apologized for breaking in his presence.
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
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Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink.
If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
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Chuck Norris doesn't fall, he merely tests the durability of the floor with his face.
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Chuck Norris doesn't pick up his food to eat it.
He commands it to enter his mouth.
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Chuck Norris leaves potholes when he jogs.
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The world ends on December 21st, 2012.
Only because that's when Chuck Norris masters the Falco Punch.
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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Chuck Norris caught the gingerbread man.
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Chuck Norris cuts off parts of his beard and sells it...we know this as kevlar.
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