Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
Chuck Norris won a staring contest with his eyes closed.
If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby. Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris never uses a navigation system. The direction he is heading is ALWAYS the right direction.
You don't leave a room, Chuck Norris throws you out.
Why does Chuck Norris have a beard? A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.
Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.