What did Stevie Wonder say when he found out he was blind?
"Well, at least I'm not black."
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Q: What do you call a baby Mexican?
A: A paragraph because he's too short to be an essay!
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The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot.
They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them.
So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign "Speedbird 206″:
Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway."
Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven."
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944 but I didn’t stop."
Q: Why do Jewish men get circumcised?
A: Because Jewish women won't touch anything unless it's 20% off.
How are black people and wolves similar?
They both fight in packs.
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There was a tornado in my area the other day.
The sky was so black; it took my bike.
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What do nigger pimps and farmers have in common?
They both need a hoe to stay in business!
Q: What do you get when you cross an alligator with a road runner?
A: A 100 mph nigger eater.
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A large cruise ship strikes an iceberg and slowly begins to sink. The captain declares he is going to need to remove some weight from the boat or it will surely sink. He says to be fair, and not discriminate, we will have to call out people in alphabetical order to jump off the ship. Everyone agrees this is the only fair way.
The captain then declares "All African Americans, jump overboard!"
A niglet tells his dad"Oh noes, dat be us". His nigger dad says "No sons, dats not be quiet"
The captain comes back and says "unfortunately, we haven't lost enough weight yet. I will have to ask all black people to jump overboard."
The niglet tells his dad again"Oh noes, dat be us". His nigger dad says "No sons, dats not be quiet"
The captain comes back and says "unfortunately, we still haven't lost enough weight yet. I will have to ask all colored people to jump overboard."
The niglet tells his dad again"Oh noes, dat be us". His nigger dad says "I said shut up son, we be niggers today!"
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Q: How many Ethiopians can you fit into a telephone booth?
A: All of them.
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An old Jewish man gets on the subway in New York and sees a priest.
He notices the white collar, and decides to ask what it’s about.
"Why do you wear your collar backwards?" The old Jewish man asks.
The Priest, being polite, responds, "Well, Sir, because I’m a father."
"I am a father too, but I wear my collar normal."
"Yes," the Priest begins, "but I am father of many."
The old Jewish man shakes his head. "I have 8 children, and so many grandchildren I don’t know most their names, and still my collar isn’t backwards."
The priest, aggitated, slams his fist in his palm "Sir! I am the father of hundreds!"
The elderly Jewish man, beweildered, stands to get off the subway, and leans over to the priest "Mister, maybe you should start wearing your pants backwards."