Chuck Norris has an Xbox Live account. On Playstation
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The ground hog only pokes his head out to check for Chuck Norris.
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The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes.
He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
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Chuck Norris doesn't solve math - math solves Chuck Norris.
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Note to self:
Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired.
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The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
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Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
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If Chuck Norris appears in your dream, don't panic, he is only looking for Freddy Krueger.
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Chuck Norris once won a drag race with a unicycle.
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