Wonder Woman's magic Lasso is actually one of Chuck Norris' chest hairs.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris pitties Mr. T.
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Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
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Chuck Norris didn't sign the Declaration of Idependence because he wanted the British to think they had chance.
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15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest?
I don't know he is still busy.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris does not sleep.
He waits.
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Walker Texas Ranger wasn't an action crime drama, it was a documentary.
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On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
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Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
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