Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
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Jokes about Chuck Norris are not funny, but all are afraid not to laugh.
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Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
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The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
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Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.
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The sun is the burning remains of the last planet Chuck Norris pillaged.
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When Chuck Norris burns calories, he uses a flamethrower.
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Chuck Norris didn't sign the Declaration of Idependence because he wanted the British to think they had chance.
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There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris...
Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.
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