In space Chuck Norris can hear your screams.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
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Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
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Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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Chuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.
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In high school, Chuck Norris was voted "Most."
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Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
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The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.
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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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In India, cows wait until Chuck Norris crosses the street.
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