Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls... He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.
If Chuck Norris were president, he would protect the secret service.
Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.
If Chuck Norris told you to jump off a bridge, would you? Of course you would.
Chuck Norris has won tennis match against a wall.
A watched pot boils instantly for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.