Do you know why the Earth's spinning ?
Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
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A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are:
1. Heart disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer
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Don King once had straight hair, until that day he saw Chuck Norris' eyes staring him down.
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Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth.
The next day he won the lottery.
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Chuck Norris won a game of chess with checker pieces.
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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
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Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.
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Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
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Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
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April doesn't fool Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris fools April.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to face the consequences, the consequences have to face Chuck Norris.
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