Chuck Norris sleeps until he tells the sun to get up.
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Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.
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If you stare at the ameican flag long enough you'll see a 3D image of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris gave birth to himself because nobody else is capable (or could even live) to give birth to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris beat the light speed by 2 hours and 23 minutes.
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World War II started because Burger King screwed up Chuck Norris' order.
Today Burger King NEVER gives you onions unless you ask for them.
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When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
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Chuck Norris flosses with dynamite wick.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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Messing with Chuck Norris is the only thing that will get you disqualified from a Colonial Penn Life Insurance policy - at any age.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
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