Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris doesn't jump. He moves the ground away from him.
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Chuck Norris is in every action film ever made but sometimes he only shows up as EXPLOSIONS.
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Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
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When Chuck Norris says "Jump", you don't say, "How high?" - you say, "When do I come down?"
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Chuck Norris invented black.
In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light.
Except pink.
Tom Cruise invented pink.
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The Titanic sunk because Chuck Norris ran into it during his swim.
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Chuck Norris made time wait.
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My Prediction for the Mayweather Mcgregor fight.
It becomes a Handicap Match against Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris ends it with a single roundhouse kick before the bell stops ringing.
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Chuck Norris can copy and paste on a typewriter.
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