Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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The wind of Chuck Norris's round house kick can be felt from 1600 million miles away.
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Chuck Norris broke the law once.
It still isn’t fixed.
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Chuck Norris told Anne Robinson she was the weakest link and made her leave the stage.
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Chuck Norris fills a 1-Liter Bottle With 2 liters of water.
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Chuck Norris was once in a catch 22, but he roundhouse kicked it down to to a 12 pack and literally drank his problems away.
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Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
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Chuck Norris can block Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook account.
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When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor exclaimed, "It's a man!"
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In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kicks your ass.
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Chuck Norris jokes are a oxymoron because Chuck Norris isn't a joke.
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