Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese.
At the same time in every sentence.
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Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers.
The food cooks itself out of pressure.
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Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris stared at the sun... the sun went blind.
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Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
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Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.
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Chuck Norris fills a 1-Liter Bottle With 2 liters of water.
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Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
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15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest?
I don't know he is still busy.
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