Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you. Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
You don't invite Chuck Norris. He invites himself.
The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
Prisons don’t keep society safe from criminals. Prisons keep criminals safe from Chuck Norris, for now.
Chuck Norris called McDonald's through the television.
Chuck Norris' primary weapon in Call of Duty is his roundhouse kick.
Nietzsche's book was originally called Also Sparch Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".