Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
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While we all get checked by the airport security, Chuck checks the airport security.
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Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
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Chuck Norris already has Final Fantasy XXI.
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Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb.
On his penis.
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Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need twitter, he's already following you.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
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Chuck Norris' jokes don't have punchlines.
They have footprints.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck Norris saw the Invisible Man.
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