Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
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Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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Water can drown if Chuck Norris stays underwater for too long.
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You know the movie, Alien VS Predator?
Well it used to be called Alien VS Predator VS Chuck Norris, but no body would pay to see a fight 7 seconds long.
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Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris won the Kentucky derby, on a Unicorn.
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If Chuck Norris movies were in 3D, the audience would be dead.
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The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chuck Norris once decided to dig a hole, today we call it the Grand Canyon.
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The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
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Chuck Norris does his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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