When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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Chuck Norris knows what color a smurf turns when you choke it.
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Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
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Chuck Norris has a daugter: Jason Bourne.
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Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
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If Chuck Norris drinks too much, he doesn't throw up, he throws down!
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Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
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Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral.
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Chuck Norris is why we don't need no stinking badgers.
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Chuck Norris can spell roundhouse kick with five letters: death.
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