The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
Four-year-old to her two-year-old sister: "Let's play Christmas. I'll be Santa Claus and you can be a present and I'll give you away."
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
Chuck Norris has 2 kids. We know them as Pain and Suffering.
Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed went itself out of fear.
Q: What does Superman, Batman, and Ironman have in common? A: When they were kids they wanted to be Chuck Norris
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!