Chuck Norris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
Chuck Norris was bitten by a werewolf. When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
When everyone else can't, Chuck Norris CAN.
Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
Once Chuck Norris attempted to punch through a brick wall, but the brick wall crumbled in fear.
They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.
Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.
The actual definition of U.F.O is Chuck Norris's Toy Frisbee.
Chuck Norris once starred in Wheel of Fortune. The last twenty nine minutes were spent in an awkward silence, waiting for the wheel to stop spinning.