Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF!
Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
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Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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Q: What does Superman, Batman, and Ironman have in common?
A: When they were kids they wanted to be Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby, he sucked on a pacifier and made it cry.
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When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.
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Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t ride a horse, he uses his crotch to carry it.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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