The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
Chuck Norris' free advice is worth a fortune.
Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls... He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
Nobody has ever told Chuck Norris a yo-mama joke and lived to tell about it.
The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.
It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
Chuck Norris bunked school one day. Till today that day is known as Sunday.
Fire trucks and ambulances pull to the shoulder when chuck Norris drives by.