The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed. She is now known as Britney Spears.
I think Chuck Norris is fake cuz if he were real he'd come right now and smash my face into my keyboaraoebdbfjvjdblgoirugsvdkf
Chuck Norris invented the internet so that he could reach his enemies, preferably ninjas.
According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
Solar flares are a myth... it's really Chuck Norris' flashlight.
When Chuck Norris hired his bodyguards, he figured he was paying to save someone.
Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a beard by choice, even the jaws of life can't cut it.