The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
Wherever you go, Chuck Norris will already be there.
Chuck Norris recently got himself an iPad. It turned into iDust when he tried to use it.
The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor exclaimed, "It's a man!"
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
Chuck Norris got a perfect SAT score by just putting his name on the paper...
Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
Chuck Norris cut's a knife with butter.
Chuck Norris eats lightning and shits out thunder.