You know the movie, Alien VS Predator?
Well it used to be called Alien VS Predator VS Chuck Norris, but no body would pay to see a fight 7 seconds long.
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The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris says "Jump", you don't say, "How high?" - you say, "When do I come down?"
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Chuck Norris can play Bach's 9th Symphony with a triangle.
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Chuck Norris once won the title of Iron Chef by cooking instant ramen noodles.
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When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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The names 'Adam and Eve' were simply coverups.
They were really Chuck and Norris.
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Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar.
The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up.
Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an Ipod, he has an Ifist.
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Chuck Norris cannot be put in a corner.
The corner always backs away.
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