There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
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Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light.
Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
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Chuck Norris went to the virgin islands.
Now they are pregnant.
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Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
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Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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There is no use crying over split milk, unless it's Chuck Norris' milk.
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The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
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Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA.
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