There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
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Chuck Norris watched the first season of "24" in 5 hours.
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Chuck Norris invented the internet so that he could reach his enemies, preferably ninjas.
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Ghosts are created when Chuck Norris kills people to fast for the grim reaper to prosses.
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
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Allstate gets insurance from Chuck Norris, because even Allstate needs to be in good hands.
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Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.
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Chuck Norris haunts ghosts.
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Chuck Norris once walked in the opposite direction in the Running of the Bulls.
The bulls turned around and ran for their lives.
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