Chuck Norris caught all the pokemon with a Nokia 3310.
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When Chuck Norris decides he wants to kill some time... it's not a figure of speech.
He actually does it.
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Chuck Norris went up Niagra Falls in a barrel.
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Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names.
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Chuck Norris has the iPhone 5...he got it back in '84.
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light.
He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
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Chuck Norris runs until the Treadmill gets tired.
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Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who could truly judge a book by its' cover.
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