I hear you take milk baths. That's right. Why? I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower.
Q: What do you call a car only British animals can drive? A: OxFord.
Q: Where did the newlywed horses stay? A: In the bridle suite.
It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
What's a rabbits favorite movie? Rabbits of the Lost Ark.
How do snails get their shells all shiny? They use snail polish.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and sheep? A wooly jumper.
Two rabbits are in a garden and one of the rabbits says, "Thith carrot tathes pithy." The other rabbit says, "Yes, I know, I just pithed on it."
What did the magician say when he made his rabbit disappear? Hare today, gone tomorrow.
A father notices his young son staring at something on the ground. The father approaches his son and asks what he's looking at. The boy says that he sees two daddy long legs on top of each other, and asks what they're doing. They father replies that the two spiders are having sex. It's a completely natural thing that a mommy and daddy do when they love each other. The son then asks if one is a daddy long leg and the other is a mommy long leg. The father says that they're both daddy long legs. The son stomps on them, killing them. The father asks why he did that. The boy replies "I don't want any of that faggot-ass shit in my yard."
Two friends were walking through the woods when they thought they heard something. They turned around and saw a big black bear coming towards them. Both men started to run when one of them stopped to change into tennis shoes. The second man said "You don't have time to change shoes. You can't outrun that bear!" The first man said, "I know I can't outrun the bear. I only have to outrun you"!