Joke #6653

Q:Did you hear the joke about the rope? A:Just skip it.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: life

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Two Reasons why it's so hard to solve a redneck murder: Firstly, the DNA all matches and secondly, there are no dental records.
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: death, dentist, life, mean, redneck
A couple of blonde men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the blonde men walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." The clerk said, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?" The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck. He returned a minute later and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-fours." "All right. How long do you need them?" The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check." After a while, the customer returned to the office and said, "A long time. We're gonna build a house."
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde, life, time
A man makes a phone call to an export office in a port of France, and asks whether they can ship a 20’ container with live geese properly stored in their appropriate places. Oui monsieur; what is the destination port for this load? I’m sending them to the zoo in Brazil. Wouldn’t you be better off calling the export office in Portugal? Why is that sir? If you’re sending them to Brazil to avoid bureaucracy, then you should contact the Portuguese; of course!
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has 15.15 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: life
One day Daily Mail has a article with title: "One in four cannot read." The next day one another newspaper writes: "Nice to see a newspaper finally acknowledging their audience."
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has 76.99 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: life
If someone ever intimidates you, remember that they're 70% water. Are you scared of water? Well you should be. 400,000 people drown per year.
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has 74.43 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: death, life
In the town I have met one older woman, she told me: "if you give me ten euros, I will pray for your black soul." I gave her the ten euros, became suspicious, didn't believe her and told her: "ok, but pray for me right now, not in the evening." The woman has begun: "guardian angel, please, take care of my soul, forgive me all my sins and give me everything I need in my life." I have asked her only: "for my money?"
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: life, money, old people, religious
Google is setting up a new search engine to answer life's difficult and most complex questions with the response always being the same... Chuck Norris.
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has 65.57 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, IT, life
A punk rocker gets on the bus with green, yellow, purple and orange hair. An old guy sitting on the bus stares at him, and the punk says, "What's the matter, old man, didn't you ever do anything wild in your life?" And the old man says, "Yeah, one time I fucked a parrot. I thought maybe you were my kid."
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has 75.33 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: animal, life, sex
Chuck Norris was born in a house he build himself.
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has 63.51 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, life
Do you know what a plateau is? It's the highest form of flattery!
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: life