What is grosser than gross?
When you're kissing Grandma and she slips you the tongue.
Vote:
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Q: What's worse then finding 10 zombie babies in a garbage can?
A: Finding one zombie baby in 10 garbage cans.
Vote:
A family brings their elderly mother to a nursing home.
The nurses bathe her and set her in a chair at a window.
After a while, she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair.
Two attentive nurses immediately straighten her up.
Again, she starts to tilt to the other side.
The nurses rush back to put her upright.
This goes on all morning.
Later, the family arrives and asks, "Are they treating you all right?"
"It's pretty nice," the old woman replies. "Except they won't let you fart."
Vote:
Barnum & Bailey was transferring the circus from one town to another.
The elephants were connected trunk to tail.
They came along a railroad crossing and as the elephants were halfway across the tracks, a train came along and killed two of them.
Shortly thereafter, B&M Railroad received an invoice from Barnum and Bailey for $10,000.
B&M immediately called Barnum & Bailey and requested an explanation for the charge, writing, "What is the cost of a new elephant?"
Barnum & Bailey responded, "$1,000 each."
B&M responded, "But, we only killed two of them!"
Barnum & Bailey said, "Yes, but you pulled the assholes out of eight others."
Vote:
An old man and his wife went to the doctor's office.
The doctor asked the man for a blood, urine and feces sample.
The man was slightly deaf and said, "What?"
The doctor said, "I need a blood, urine and feces sample."
The man still looked puzzled, so his wife leaned over and yelled into his ear, "Sheldon, the doctor needs a pair of your underwear."
Vote:
Q: How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?
A: Pick it up and suck it's dick.
Vote:
Q: Did you hear about the annoying midget who went to a nudist colony?
A: He kept getting in everyone's hair.
Vote:
Q: Did you hear about the new movie "Constipation?"
A: It hasn't come out yet.
Vote:
A woman walks into a restaurant and sits down.
As she bends down to reach into her purse for her wallet, she farts loudly with the waiter right behind her.
She sits abruptly back up, glares at the waiter and shouts “Stop that!”
To which the waiter replies, “Sure, which way did it go?”
Vote:
What's pink and red and silver and crawls into walls?
A baby with forks in its eyes.
Vote:
What's the difference between a baby and a grandmother?
Grandmothers don't die when you fuck them up the ass.
Vote:
