If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.
Chuck Norris' beard has a tattoo.
You don't leave a room, Chuck Norris throws you out.
Chuck Norris can make sounds come out on his Air Guitar.
Chuck Norris is so fast that when he runs, he can see his back.
Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.
There were 3 people on a boat, Chuck Norris, Jesus, and the Penelope, Jesus said "I bet I can walk across the water." He did, Chuck Norris tried, he did, the Penelope said "They did it that means I do it." , He tried, he sank, Jesus said: "Should I have told him about the rocks?" Chuck Norris said "What rocks?"
Jesus is the son of God. God is the son of Chuck Norris.