Chuck Norris can find the end of a circle.
Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.
Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row. The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris gave birth to himself because nobody else is capable (or could even live) to give birth to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once donated blood to a man, hes' known as Super Man.
Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
Scissors are told not to run with Chuck Norris.
Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.