Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it.
Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
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Chuck Norris can pop every kernel in the bag without burning one.
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Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
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In America, Chuck Norris finds you But in Soviet Russia, you find Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
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When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer.
You will score a 1600.
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The last thing that you see before you die, is Chuck Norris.
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The Tower of Pisa was in Chuck Norris' way.
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